Do you Hunger for your Destiny as separated lovers long for the embrace of their beloved?
Does that hunger, that longing permeate the I, the Thou, the all of one’s experience. Or was that long ago, so distant that the memory of it is all but dead? What is remembered? Is it the pain of being torn asunder….the suffering of the heart so piercing that it is physical, as if the soul is being drawn and quartered? What is remembered? Is it Excruciating. Suffocating the I. a Gasping for breath followed by loss of consciousness until All sense of time disappears and then the awakening in the blackness and emptiness of the VOID?
It is in the Living of this emptiness for which there are no words that the Seeker sets out to become full again.
Wandering aimlessly, seeking the ONE that removes the listlessness by in filling him with the breath of life, he occasionally stumbles across a clue here and there. Wherever that clue leads, the Seeker goes, every road, every path, a dead end, until, one day, he sees more clearly. He is playing The Hunger Games…..Does he hunger for his Destiny, or is he merely interested. Does the hunger knaw inside of him as Unrequited Love? Is his soul separated from its Destiny a parched and barren wasteland?
As if being roused from a sleep so deep that it is unto death itself, the Seeker fights back the darkness. He must fulfill his life purpose. But how?
The land itself wars against him, drawing the life-force out of him….searing hot under a fierce sun during the day…bitter cold with an icy wind mocking the moon and the stars at night. Through sheer force of will, the Seeker continues in pursuit of his heart’s desire. He knows that he must find the Beloved, or die. In the distance, he sees an Oasis! Hope fills his heart. The Oasis is a bittersweet vision, offering the promise of better conditions, the possibility of……of what? Shaking himself, he walks forward, praying that the Oasis is real, and not a mirage. After many hours, he enters into the shade of the date palms and drinks deeply from cool waters welling up from deep within the earth, reminding him of the sweetness of…..something….
It has been so many years that he barely remembers what caused him to embark upon this journey. The Oasis draws out from deep in his consciousness the memory of a fragrant garden abounding in life, bursting with love. Why did he leave that garden for this desolation of anguish and despair? Gathering dates to nourish him, he lies down to sleep, knowing he faces greater desolation on the road ahead. Sleep finally comes…. Fitful… shallow…depriving the body of rest and strength. As dawn breaks the darkness, he sets out upon his quest once again.
Straining, striving, with intense mental effort and will, the Seeker brings forth the face of the Beloved. He tries to feel the gentle touch, the loving embrace….so long ago. Profound sadness overtakes him, encasing his body, heart, mind and spirit. Every step a massive effort, every breath is labored. He surrenders to resignation. Always seeking, never finding…..this is his life.
Suddenly, a fork in the road stops him. In the distance on one fork’s path, he sees a mountain fortress. The other fork leads into the abyss of the desert. But the desert is familiar, so much so that he starts down that path until something stirs, and he goes back, choosing the other road. Voices within his mind mock him, filling his ears with cynical laughter and scorn.
“You cannot possibly climb the heights to that stronghold on the mountaintop. You will die. Go back! Go Back.”
The Seeker is resolute. “I choose the mountain. I don’t know why, but I long for it, deeply, profoundly……I hunger for the promise of what is there. Something stirs from within my soul. My heart, for the first time in many years, is light. My eyes see…..they see my heart’s desire. I know not what lies ahead, but I go.”
The landscape transforms as he presses forward. Grasses, a stream, then scrubby trees, and finally a broad river. The river runs deep and swift. As the Seeker stands on the wooded bank, a man appears.
“In truth, I know not. Except that I must get across this river. Do you see that fortress? I do not know what it holds, except that, whatever it is, it is my Destiny.”
“To arrive at Destiny, you must conquer idle dreams. This is the River of Dreams. Cross it you must, or it will sweep you under its spell and carry you into nothingness. Your only chance of successfully navigating the River of Dreams is to make a solemn oath to yourself that nothing will distract you from your path. As you cross the river, she will sing siren songs that soak your consciousness, that call to you, that create longing for her waters, but know this….the River of Dreams leads to destruction and death, and all that she promises is a lie.”
“How do I cross her safely?”
“Your master the Hunger Games inside your head. Your hunger for your Destiny must be greater, stronger, than any other thing in your being. Your Destiny fulfills you in body, mind, and spirit. It is the coming together of the Lover and the Beloved. All that you require is already within you. Awaken to it. Energize it. Dwell upon it. Sing to it. Speak to it. See it in every breath that you take. Deepen it. Woo it as you would a lover. Strengthen it until the Longing for it becomes the driving force of your very life. When you have done so, the Bridge of the Corpus Callosum will appear across the River of Dreams. Then, only then, can you safely cross.”
The Seeker gazed across the river at the fortress. So near, and yet so far. He pondered what he had just been told. When he looked back, the man had disappeared.
A second crossroad…..This one made the first one look so easy. That was simply a choice immediately fulfilled. He thought of the Beloved, seeing her face clearly, envisioning the play of the light on her hair, the softness of her skin, the loving gaze of her eyes. Burning Desire overtakes him. He looks back across the River of Dreams, sees the bridge his Imagination has created, and sets forth across it, confident that his journey is already accomplished.